Class Play
by Dale Rivers
Summary: This is a Crac Fic...Completely untrue......This is what you get when you cross Battlestar Galactica and a Starbucks Coffee Menue........


This story contains all the Blends from the Starbucks Coffee menu and Boomer – Caprica 6 – Baltar - Adama of Battlestar Galactica.

This is a Crac Fic and it is only done in fun…..

Once again RDM owns the Characters I am just borrowing them…

Warning – PG

Author – Dale Rivers

Script For The children of Battle star Galactica in school

Prologue:

**Narrator**

Due to advances in cloning Cylon Tecnology with Humans the Cylons trail a new breed of child that is hoped will inter breed with standard humans to create an "Uber" Cylon or Super Cylon if you will. The Clylons Gathered genetic material from far and wide and failed badly in their first experiments the Hybrid cells would not replicate and the fact that the Cylons nuked most of the known genetic human material did not help matters either.

Enter the crew of the all impressive Galactica who unknowingly had their DNA stolen by Cylons masquerading as Ipods? Each of these new off spring were given names which relate them to their genetic donors (Some more than others particularly Miss Starbuck see story). Also it must be remembered that most of their funding came from a very successful coffee house franchise. Our opening scene is at the Top secret Cylon elementary school. Where it is a typical day and our class of genetic young hopefuls is about to begin.

_Teacher enters class room to a room full of mischievous children, talking and misbehaving. Kids start to quieten down when teacher enters the class room._

**Teacher**: "Good Morning Class"

**Students in unison**: "Good morning Mr Cuppa-Joe"

**Teacher**: Right class settle down and we will get right into today's lesson of human mathematics. Now then who can tell me what we are learning today?

**Muffled Voice from Back of Classroom**: "Fractions Sir"

**Teacher**: Right who said that? I will not tolerate that kind of foul Language in this class room! Right Double Espresso! Double Espresso! That was you who said that? Heavens child why do I have to say every thing twice with you? Well you just bought yourself detention you and Double-Half-Caff-Decaff-With-A-Twist-Of-Lemon-No-Lid-To-Go, can see me after class.

And for goodness sake Chi-Tea would you get off the floor and sit down at the desk like the rest of the class. Goodness me what would the Principal say if knew that some of his students were committing that kind of infucktion?

Now class open your books to page 37 of your books on Understanding Fucktions.

_Teacher then notices a foul smell in the air:_

**Teacher**: Right which one of you keeps passing gas in the class room? Was it you triplets, with identical names? Oh very Well Boom-Boom-Boom-Go off to the bathroom both of my nostrils have fried. It's like something has died!

For heavens sake you there the foreign exchange student Macciato! Open a window the smell is terrible and poor Capuccino is already frothing at the mouth. You Boomers what kind of gas is that? You had better take a good hard look at your diets look at those two kids over there with tears in their eyes? Poor "Latte" (Pronounced Lart-E) and Adama. They are turning green. Ok you two off to the nurse right now. Now don't collapse and die on me here off you go….Oh Latte, Adama life goes on, la, la, la, la life goes on!

Now then to our lesson. Frappe! Frappe if I have Half a brain and take away a quarter of that brain what am I left with?

_Voice from the back of the classroom:_

A promising career in Clylon Teaching?

_Class erupts in laughter!_

Teacher: Right who said that? Was that you Columbian Blend? No? Then get that look off your face! Along with that funny powder!

Brazilian Blend that was you wasn't it? See me after class! French Roast I know you are getting a lift home with him, so try and ride a bike! You may find you actually good at it!

Listen if I don't have some order in this class right now you will all be in detention Caprica stop passing notes to your friend Paprika! I am sure whatever you have to say can wait until recess! The same goes for you  
Parsley, Sage, Rosemary and Thyme!

Perhaps we can continue with the lesson were is the off spring of Guias Baltar. Young Balter! I said Balter! BALTER!

_Student from the back off the class replies._

Gazunthiet!

Teacher Replies:

I WAS NOT BLOODY SNEEZING! Now where is Baltar? I have had just about enough of this class. And my patience has worn down to but a fraction of what is was!

_Class goes ooooohhh you swore._

_**T**_**eacher: I **meant to say Fuction oh I give up! Class Dissmissed!


End file.
